I am the proud mother of two beautiful girls, Valentina and Mariaignacia. In their own way, they have given me the gift of not only embracing motherhood, but also and equally important, embracing who I am, and ultimately, embracing love.
Our enormous influence affects in a unique way life and development of future adults who will lead the next generation. Therefore, the effect of our formative labor will be felt many years from today, in a good or a bad way.
This is a titanic and a beautiful task! That is why many of us recognize in our children our true mentors. Most of us have probably already reflected on how much we learn from them because they force us to understand the impact of our actions, and reshape them every now and then. They teach us how to handle our own emotions in a way we had never done before becoming mothers. Sometimes we manage to do it, many others we don’t, but every single time we have learned something important.
We can’t be a “mother-friend”. It is a mistake to establish a relationship without the leadership to guide. That hurts children and teenagers so much. It makes them feel like abandoned children from a mother who doesn’t want to assume that role and wants to take the place of a friend they don’t need. Our children demand guidance, order, boundaries, and direction to feel safe. But be careful not to fall into arbitrary behaviors and become controlling mothers who want to determine every single moment in their children’s life. These kids might get to the point of restraining their wishes and not knowing what they want anymore. According to Stephen Polter, an expert in these matters, exert too much control over a kid only produces insecurity, anxiety, fear of failure, and low tolerance to frustration.
We must center our task in being a companion in our children’s life. Our goal as mothers is to educate them to be independent. It must be clear to us that we are not the ones to set our children’s goals; we are here to walk along and guide them. Motherhood is a complex task that requires a lot of effort, attention, and responsibility.
We have to embrace motherhood. Being a mother should not be a fight, a fight against our own selves and ultimately a fight with those who surround us. We should stop fighting and begin accepting, begin embracing who we are, what we can achieve, and what we truly deserve.
I can embrace and enjoy motherhood in ways I couldn’t have imagined before. I can live my motherhood in a more fully, freely and open way. This adventure has been one of the most valuable journeys I have ever set out on. I am thankful for the presence of Valentina and Mariaignacia in my life and for the sacred mission of being a mom.
I congratulate each and every one of you for the great task of being a mother, for your commitment, your responsibility, and your great ability to love, to transform yourselves and the life of others!